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Brett Geeves: Virender Sehwag should get ready for economy class after being dropped for third Test
Take yourself back a few weeks and you will remember I copped a bit of stick from the Indian community for their lack of understanding for the "Australian way" when it comes to humour.
I will concede my sense of humour is a little further left of centre than most. I also tend to add a little pepper to stories, meaning I might exaggerate to ensure the story is entertaining.
My playing career can be split into two halves.
First five years
As you may have read previously, I am not a fan of watching cricket for more than about five overs. So once we had finished bowling air jordan 13 flint, you would find me reading a book, listening to music, eating toasties or watching the NBA. I was pulled into a meeting with the chairman of selectors and captain of the team. I was asked whether or not I was enjoying being a first-class cricketer. They had perceived my behaviour to be insular and not team-orientated. I lied and told them I loved the game and the team and that I would endeavour to get around the boys more.
Second five years
There were reasons other than the fact I didn't really like cricket, as to why I would remove myself from any social involvement during games. I am a pest. I get bored easily and when this happens, my sense of humour gets me into trouble. After my talking-to from team based hierarchy, I decided that I should in fact start enjoying myself air jordan retro 11 concord; even if it meant a further breakdown in relationships with those involved in the team. I was borderline depressed and things couldn't get any worse. New plan: I would never turn down the opportunity for a beer and I removed my humour filter valve. There was no coincidence that my cricket improved because I was having fun, but inevitably, relationships broke down. None more than the budding love of Geeves and Virender Sehwag. It could have been so special.
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My selection to the Delhi Daredevils in 2008, coincided with the second half of my career. With no filter and a zero tolerance on refusal of beer, my time in Delhi was destined to fail; made worse by the fact that I was offered a two-year extension** on my contract after the first training session! I relaxed.
As previously explained, my sense of humour was completely lost on a good portion of my Indian teammates. I guess this is the beauty of the IPL and other tournaments that bring a multitude of cultures, personalities and playing styles together.
This is not to say I didn't and don't respect these guys. I was so excited to be a part of this team and to meet Virender Sehwag in particular; that upon meeting the little champ, I threw glue and feathers on him and sang songs of his brilliance.
When bowling to him in centre wicket practice, I would deliberately bowl short and wide so I could watch his brutal uppercut fly 14 rows into the stands. I idolise the guy as a cricketer and was devastated to see he has been dropped for this Test.
There was one instance that pretty much sums up my struggles with my non-westerner teammates, and Sehwag in particular.
We were at the airport waiting for the very first team flight. The team manager was handing out the tickets and it very quickly became apparent that if you had played international cricket you had a seat in business class and if you had not jordan 9 cool grey, you were in economy, which could only be described as a deodorant-free zone.
What didn't help my cause in this scenario was the fact I was still on my night out for the previous evening and so were a good portion of the team.
When we boarded the plane, I was in the very first row of economy and my foot could reach the back of Daniel Vettori's business class chair. Fortunately for me, the flight was to Punjab and only 40 minutes long ... because I kicked the back of Dan's chair for 40 minutes straight and created a song to fit the tune of my kicking.
It was titled "You dudes are big heads" and I sang it the whole way to Punjab. Vettori, McGrath and DeVilliers laughed ... for at least five minutes - the rest did not.
On arrival, there was a team meeting.
Sehwag: "It seems that some people (looking directly at me) have an issue with the way the seats on plane have been set up. We should talk about this and come up with an answer."
Awkward silence, then
Geeves: "No issue Viru, at home we fly economy and this is no problem for someone who is 5'11. Although jordan 12, if you want a change to current plan and there are not enough seats for everyone in business class, then maybe we should look at the larger guys being allocated seats up front.
McGrath, Vettori and Maharoof and most of the other quicks are all over 6'4 and could use the extra leg room.
Sehwag screams: "NO, IT IS NOT THE SIZE OF PLAYER - BUT SIZE OF NAME THAT COUNTS"
Falling off my chair in a fit of laughter and crying "Oh my god, he didn't, did he," was possibly a bad response.
** You might be surprised to know that I did not see the second and third years of my contract. After the tournament finished, I sent an email to the manager asking the dates we were required back the following year so I could arrange a holiday. The email I received ran a little something like this "Dear Geeves, you are no longer a required member of the Delhi Daredevils franchise. Also, you owe us $3000 for an oversize luggage bill. Please pay this at your earliest convenience" - Sacked, Viru hates you and you us money C bam!!
Watch the third Test LIVE, EXCLUSIVE and in HIGH DEFINITION on Fox Sports 2 from 2.30pm (EDT) and follow it online with our Match Centre.
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